thoughts

As i am reading through my marketing notes, I am feeling lost somehow..

Since i started school, I took part in many activities and made many new friends. From these, I saw a new and different world. One that not many will dare to dream to be in it. One that may seem fun, but in reality, it is scary and dangerous. Yet, there was another side of it. One which is welcoming and filled with opportunities

I was facebook-"hopping" and saw a profile.. It was unintentional, but I saw a video. The one when we had our last captain's ball match. Initially, there was still hope in making to the final spot. But weariness and inability stood out like a sore thumb and we could not succumb to those, resulting in immediate failure. Many said it was a job well-done. Being a perfectionist, there was nothing i could do but accept the fact that we lost. There, a comment wrote," 实力差很多喔！“ That seriously stung. Although it was long over, the moment the video started playing, my heart just started racing like there was no tomorrow. I became breathless and tears nearly started to form. Ending that match in that hall was very much the last time i wanted to step into that school. Unfortunately, we were supposed to have exams there. Right in that hall where everything happened. Right there where the bloody teacher took sides and "assumed" full authority.

The feeling that i am having now is unexplainable.Perhaps, a cowardly and quiet soul which wishes to find a dark and immensely deep hole to hide.

Now, only time will tell.